I recently found a journal entry I wrote months back, on the drive home from Bret’s cardiology appointment – where, after a long year of mysterious health challenges, scary moments, and heart procedures, he got an amazing report about how well his heart was healing and doing (yay!)…
…and I think there’s something really important in what I journaled that may be able to serve YOU too.
Have you ever gone through a challenging, painful, or worrisome season of life and found, even after it passed, that some of the emotional residue from it still lingered?
If so, I invite you to keep reading…
Of course, on that drive home, after the wonderful update from his cardiologist, I felt all the expected things – relief and gratitude being prominent.
And yet, I also noticed some little voice within that was tempted to look around and see what else I still needed to be vigilant or concerned about.
Fortunately, I caught this sweet little voice immediately.
(But I know it’s not always so easy.)
I caught the part of me that had been working so hard for many months to support Bret with all the detective work around his heart…
…I caught the part of me that had laid awake countless nights, simply listening to his heartbeat and breath to make sure he was okay…
…I caught that part of me tempted to remain or revert back to a role I no longer needed to play.
This part of me that loves, cares about, and would do just about anything for Bret, who had worked so hard to try to catch every possible thing that would ensure him staying safe, alive, and healthy — no longer needed to be in that same position.
And if I didn’t give her a new and improved job, she was going to feel a little lost…
…or (this is key!) keep reverting back to a role she no longer needed to play.
Whether it is about our health or any area of life, I see this happen all the time with us precious humans and have witnessed it countless times with clients over the years:
how the external can change and improve…
…and yet we still function out of the same *internal* system as we did during the challenge…
…sometimes even for years or decades.
>> And it’s vitally important that we update BOTH – the external *and* the internal.
So, on the drive home from the cardiologist, I thanked this part of me who had been showing up so wholeheartedly and devotedly to help make sure dearest Bret got the best care and support imaginable…
…and then I let that part of me know she could officially retire from that role and have a little vacation…
…and that her new job gets to be showing up just as enthusiastically…
…but purely in service of enjoying, savoring, appreciating, and making the most of this amazing gift of life with Bret.
That was the most important role for her now.
And I could feel that part of me relax, let go, and know where those energies could now be best directed.
If we don’t do this…
…what can so easily happen…
…is that, even though things *externally* improve, we become so used to internally operating from certain patterns of vigilance, stress, worry, anxiety, etc. that we repeat it…
…and when we repeat it, we will always look for (and find) something to be worried or stressed or ________ (fill in the blank) about.
In fact, every thought or feeling we have, on some level, we make it more likely we will have it again.
There is 1000000% an essential purpose in bringing ALL our thoughts and feelings out into the light – where they can be felt, seen, heard, loved, and accepted.
But when we simply repeat them unconsciously…over and over?
>> We essentially memorize unhelpful and unhealthy thoughts and feelings.
(Not exactly what we’d want to train ourselves to memorize.)
And we start having these thoughts and feelings over and over – without even realizing they are simply a pattern…
…a pattern that may have once served a purpose but no longer does…
…a pattern that first showed up to help or protect us…
…but now only holds us back.
And, fortunately, patterns can be powerfully and magnificently changed…
…into ones that are life-giving, supportive, and inspiring…
…with just a little loving awareness, realignment, and intention.
So this is some compassionate encouragement…
…to check in with yourself this week…
…to make sure you’ve updated your own internal operating system to line up with your current experiences, your future dreams and visions, and all your heart is calling for now – in this brand new, beautiful moment that’s never been here before.
Are you carrying any leftover and outdated feelings and patterns from a past chapter?
If so, thank this part of you for what a wonderful job they’ve done.
And then give them a “promotion” and explicitly assign them a new role that is of much greater service to who you are becoming.
Feeling congruent – in mind, body, heart, and spirit – where all parts of us feel updated, aligned, and on the same team…
…creates a kind of freedom unlike anything else I know…
…and I wish this for every human alive.
Abundant Love and Joy,
